August212010

Anonymous said: I am having trouble deciding what to be for Halloween. I thought about being Sailor Moon, but then again I was thinking about Supergirl. What do you think?

Halloween is one of my favorite holidays, and I know the difficult decision making when it comes to one’s costume.  You’re giving choices between Sailor Moon and Supergirl…well, let’s list some of my thoughts on an excellent costume:

1.) Are you able to afford each piece to the costume, or do you have the pieces already?

2.) Would you be embarrassed to be seen in either costume?

3.) Are you able to reconstruct each piece to said costume with easy effort?

4.) Are you comfortable in the costume?

4.) Is it legal for you to go out in public?  (some towns DO have restrictions on improper dress)

Now, both are excellent costumes, both tried and true.  If you are able, why not do both?  Especially if you have more than one party to go to!  Otherwise, I would go with the one that no one would expect you to be in.  Pretending is half the fun of Halloween…one night a year, you get to be someone you’re not. 

Frankly, I can’t tell you which costume would be better, because it comes down to your own personal preference, and what you would be most comfortable in.  But I would suggest to be unique!  If you know a million Supergirls, be Sailor Moon…and vice versa.

August202010

Anonymous said: thankyou
your advice has really helped me:)
i realised that i didnt like him,i was just scared of losing my best friend to his new girlfriend.
and,i didnt lose him.he's still my bestest friend ever,and we're still tight.
thanks for advisin' :)
i hope you know that what you do has really made a difference in my life :D
-emma

Thank you for the follow up!  It’s so nice to have someone tell me the outcome of what happened, and I’m glad it worked for you.  (It’s also nice to be appreciated too! hehe.)  So thank you for letting me know what happened!

August162010

Relationship Tip #1

I’ve decided to post tips once in awhile in the interrim of being asked for advice.  So here’s Relationship Tip #1

Honesty…with Tact!

Yes.  Honesty.  In any relationship, whether it’s friendship, marriage, or dating, honesty truly is the best policy.  Though it is true that it can hurt, and cause pain when it’s something that you DON’T really want to be honest about, if you’re honest, it also shows respect in a manner of speaking. 

You’d want your loved one to be honest to you, so why would you lie?  Even if it’s lying about if their butt looks big in a pair of pants.  If it does, then say so…with tact!  Because, really…would YOU want someone to tell you that you look good and find out later that you really look a hot mess on a plate of disgusting?  Hell no.

As I have added tact to the honesty statement, allow me to explain.  Being honest doesn’t mean you have to demolish their self esteem and be rude about it.  For instance, if you’re gonna tell him or her that they have a horrible haircut, tell them something like Honey, I’m sorry, but that hairstyle just isn’t you.  Maybe we can style it to make it uniquely you.

August152010

I am still in love with my ex, but she has moved on to another girl. How do I get over her if I see her often and hang out at her house and still want to be her friend?

Well, sometimes your best bet is to give a little space. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be her friend and hang out with her, but it will make it a little more difficult if you’re constantly subjecting yourself to your ex. Space and time is what you need.

Yes, it may hurt to not be around her so much, but in the long run, you won’t pine over her. Explain to her that you are willing to be her friend, but you need your own space to heal your wounds.

Need Advice? Just ask!

August142010

Hi, my name is Chad and I’m would like to do what you are doing as in helping others and giving advice, maybe you could help me out by reffering people or by following me. Regards Chad

Chad, I’d love to be able to do that, however, I don’t know what site you’re using or your formspring name, since you’re anonymous. I’ve been having a hard enough time getting followers, so if you scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours. :)

Need Advice? Just ask!

August132010

Anonymous said: I fell for my best friend.I helped him get his first girlfriend.It wasn't me. I feel happy for the both of them,but i feel like,there's this vacuum in my heart.I know the truth.He fell for the thought that she liked him.Turns out she did,but still,to fall for something like that.
About a month before this,I told him she liked him.Well,she did,but she got a boyfriend,and she still liked him,so she supressed those feelings.We(me and my best friend) predicted 1 month for the both of them to break up.It was horrible and childish,but,well,he really was sad that week.he wanted to kill himself and he wasnt eating right.So today,2 days before the one month mark,she breaks up with her Bf and gets together with the bestfriend,like,10 minutes later.pfft.
i suck,i hate this,i did this to myself.what do i do now?i feel awful,i dunno what to do.we still talk like normal,and heck,I'm helping him to be a better BF to her.shit.i hate myself.Im hurting myself.whywhywhywhy?

Wow, now this is a tough one.

I pose a question for you to think about:

Did you fall for him just because he is no longer availiable?

I noticed that a lot of people (including myself) tend to fall for people harder when they’re not avaliable…especially close friends.

You don’t suck.  I know that it’s hard, and I’m glad you’re happy for them.  That may make things better slightly.  But in all honesty, if you two are good friends, then you should be honest with him and tell him how you feel, but not before some serious soul searching.  Make sure that it’s not a ‘jealousy’ want, and an actual love for him.  Plus, be aware that you may end up hurting this other girl in the process, and things must be handled gently.

Yes, I know this is easier said than done, but sometimes you have to take the leap, knowing that it could lead to heartache.  It hurts worse holding it in than admitting your emotions.

August92010

Anonymous said: I like too many different people for many different reasons and I want to be faithful to one of them but how do I decide which one and what happens when someone else comes around that I obsess over.

Ahh, I know this problem all too well. Now, I’m the type of girl who likes to have her cake and eat it too, but it seems like this isn’t the case here.

You want to be faithful to one.  Understandable.  The only way that you can really decide which one, is by looking inside your heart and deciding who will love you for YOU…not because of how you look, or how much money you have, but someone who is willing to stand by you through the thick and thin.  My preference is usually someone I consider my best friend, because I know that they have already accepted me for my down and dirties.  Also, when making your choice, if they abuse you in any way, shape or form…GET…OUT…OF…THAT…RELATIONSHIP.  No one deserves to be hit or abused.

As for what happens when someone else comes around, well, that’s when you have to do some self evaluation.  Do you still feel the same about your significant other?  There is no law against looking and having fantasies.  Just don’t touch.  Cheating hurts.  Believe me, I know.  But if you find yourself obsessing over someone else, talk it over with your partner.  Let them know how you feel.  This way, you are being honest with not only them, but yourself.

Also, there’s nothing wrong with dating.  You don’t have to tie yourself down to ONE person right off the bat, especially if you don’t know much about that other person.  Get to know them before commiting…and I mean find out ALL the dirty secrets…otherwise you may be in for heartache of your own.

In regarding age, since I don’t know how old you are, there’s LOTS of pretty fish in the sea and tantalizing birds in the sky.  Don’t settle just because you don’t feel you can do any better, or settle because you’re afraid of hurting someone’s feelings.  The Love Game isn’t meant for the faint of heart, and if you’re not mature enough to handle the heartache with the love, then don’t play the game.

August72010

And now, I ask for your assistance

I’d like to get listed under the directory, so I can try and assist others.  So please, clicky on the link and help get me recommended!

http://www.tumblr.com/directory/recommend/educational/fauxvice

7PM

Need more places to ask???

Well, I just created a Formspring so you can also ask questions there!  I will post the questions/answers here as well.  So, don’t be afraid…and ask!

http://www.formspring.me/FauxVice

7PM

Anonymous said: Thanks for replying I'll see what happens when it does. Hope is soon though.

You are very welcome!  Anytime I can help, just ask away!  Try and be patient, though.  Patience seems to help in the long run.

…and thank you for being the first one to ask a question!!!

August62010

Anonymous said: Ok well here goes if you know you like lets say someone that's of your same sex or you did ounce, you tell your mother and family members of your preference but they don't believe you at all. What can you do so they do? I mean, I know how and what I feel why do I need to do so they know it's not a freaking phase.

Well, I see you’ve already made it past the hurdle on saying something to your family of your preference.  For that, I say kudos!  That takes a giant step that I myself haven’t had the balls to do.

I can understand that they would think it’s a phase, especially if you haven’t had a significant other that you had brought around, or were caught in the heat of passion with them. 

Your safest bet would be to just be yourself.  If you wind up with a boyfriend/girlfriend, and you really like them, bring them around, introduce them to the family if your significant other is comfortable to do so.  I’m not saying to ‘do the nasty’ in front of them to prove a point, but sadly you cannot change other people’s opinions.  And sometimes, the old addage that ‘seeing is believing’ is true.

11PM

Welcome to Just Advisin’

Ever wanted advice from someone who’s real, not just some magazine or newspaper woman who changes faces every 10 years?  Well, then ask away.  You can do so here, or you can email me at faxufame1982@gmail.com

I am willing to help all.  And if this blog is just for nothing than to offer a handfew of people advice…then my purpose has been fufilled.

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